Exclusive: Loren Ridinger Says Writing Her New Book 'Scrambled or Sunny-Side Up?' Following Her Husband's Death Was 'Therapeutic': 'I Realized I Wasn't Alone'

Loren Ridinger "knew" she wanted to write a book about losing her husband, JR Ridinger, since he had interest in putting pen to paper before his death.

"We just ran out of time. It just reminded me of why time is so important. My husband always had time on his brain, time on his mind, and I didn't forget that it was such an important project to him," Loren, 56, exclusively tells Morning Honey while discussing her new book, Scrambled or Sunny-Side Up? Living Your Best Life After Losing Your Greatest Love, which releases on February 11. "He had 10 outstanding things he really wanted to do. One of them was writing a book together about the lessons we learned in love and marriage and in business and the things that we did. So, I just picked up on what he wanted to do, and I wanted to make sure it happened, and it was really therapeutic for me."

In Loren's new tome, she tells the journey of losing her husband and how she dealt with the immense loss. "And although we never fully heal from grief, I think it's really important to be aware the things now that you don't learn until after you lose someone. It's a story of hope for the future, hope for healing, and a way to find yourself again," she says. "I think people will take away that it's not just about grief, it's about losing yourself and grieving who you used to be and finding yourself again and having hope for the future and that realizing that it only takes one person to believe in you."

Loren's world was rocked when JR suddenly died in 2022, but these days, she's doing "much better."

"Grief is not something that all of a sudden you feel better about. We're not sick, we don't have the flu. It's something we have to live with. We have to carry it for the rest of our lives. And so today is better than maybe the last hour or yesterday. It just depends on the day, and it depends on what's happening," she admits. "And I think I've grown a whole lot over two years. I really have worked on strengthening who I am, but I think it really is something that you have to navigate and live through on a daily basis."

By writing this book, which was "incredible therapeutic" for her," readers will notice a "different" Loren in chapter one versus the end of the book. "You will always miss the old version of yourself because that's the version of you where you had such a beautiful love story as I did and a beautiful life as I did with the person I wanted to spend it with; you always want that. I'm getting used to this new girl, and I'm proud of her. She's showing up for herself," she says.

For anyone going through something similar, Loren's advice is to "build a small circle around you because you're going to need the support. You're going to need help in the beginning, and you don't realize it because you, generally in the beginning, want to push people away. I think you need to build a small circle and trust them."

"I looked online and found so many that were so helpful to me, and I realized I wasn't alone. There were other people that experienced what I had experienced or were going through something like I was going through. There's all different levels of grief. It's important to connect with other people. Keep a journal. Honestly, keeping a journal is something I never did until I lost JR, and now I have 700 pages filled in my journal, which really helped me launch the book because I wrote down every story," she continues. "The interesting thing about grief is the first year, you forget everything about your relationship or whoever it is that you lost, like your memories. They disappear. Then one day, they come flooding back, and when they do, write them down. Every time I have a thought, a dream, I write it down and I store it in my journal, and I keep a copy of it on my phone, so I have it at all times. I'm never without it. If I have a moment and I see something and I want to write it down, I do, and I think it helps to realize that love never dies. Grief is a reflection of the biggest love."

While writing, there were a few "challenging" things Loren struggled with.

"One, writing about the day that I lost JR in Croatia, and the second was writing the letter I wish I gave him when he was still alive. That's one of the messages in the book is — don't wait for that to happen. I hope that people do something with the time now. The best part of the book is that it's done, and I feel really accomplished in knowing that I've gotten stronger since chapter one. It doesn't mean I stop grieving. I grieve every day. I go through it every day, every night, and I hit my pillow at night, especially at pillow talk time when there's no one there to talk it through," she says.

She adds, "But it's more about the growth I've seen in myself, and I'm really proud of that. When I was writing the letter to JR at the end, the letter I wish I would have given to him when he was alive, at the end of the book was the hardest. I got through it by taking my time writing it. It didn't all happen in the same moment. It all came together, and I wrote a letter, and then I rewrote it, and then I tweaked it, and I fixed it. I wanted to make sure I didn't miss anything. I wanted to make my point, and I got through it because I convinced myself that he could hear me reading it, that he could feel it as I read it out loud. So, it really helped me. I felt like he did hear me. I feel like something I never believed before, how important journaling is, writing, has been so good for my soul to help me through this process."

Loren, who is an entrepreneur and co-founder of Market America and SHOP.com, in addition to being the creator of the award-winning cosmetic line Motives®, went "right back to work" following her husband's death.

"I remembered why I did what I did for 36 years. I always remembered that my husband and I believe that helping other people succeed would make us automatically successful. And I got right back into work, which is not something I recommend necessarily to anyone. It may not be right for everybody. It was right for me," she says. "Being around other people was a source of strength for me, and it made me feel good. It was a reminder of what I did for 36 years and how much I loved it, and that even without my husband physically present, I could do it anyway and still get great joy and great pleasure out of it and fulfill my purpose. Being around people and helping other people is what my purpose is in life. And I think you have to go right back to what that is. And when you start to find yourself again and discover yourself again and realize who you are, and if your purpose is the same as it was back then like mine was, then you know that you found the right thing. You know that your purpose is you're on target, that it's the same purpose. My purpose didn't change after JR died. It became more about it. And I think that just really demonstrated how it really is what my purpose is — helping others."

Now, Loren wants to "inspire" others who might be dealing with something similar.

"I think there's so many stories that people can resonate with, but maybe they missed them along the way. All of the things that I talk about in the book that my husband did, I didn't really remember them until after I lost him. I hope I inspire people to pay attention to those things today while they're still living with the person that they love or the people they want to be around or themselves even, listening to their own subconscious, that inner voice that says, 'I can do it, I can be it, I'm capable of being anything,'" she states. "And I hope I inspire other people to realize that you're not alone in the journey of grief and loss, that it's incredibly painful, but you can find a source of help and hope for the future."

Though Loren isn't sure if she "found" herself again, she declares she's "reinvented" herself.

"I do that by remembering all the things that JR told me about myself, that I'm capable, I'm possible, and that anything I want to accomplish, I can, and I have all the abilities to do whatever I want to do, including writing a book, which I never thought I could have done. And we did it. I did it, and I did it with his help. In many ways, he wrote this book with me," she explains. "I think I do the hardest things first every day. Why? Because it's easy when you're in a lot of pain or you're going through grief to avoid doing the things that you need to do. I do those hard things first every single day. Make a priority list before I go to bed. Make sure I do those hard things first, first thing in the morning. If I want to stop working in the afternoon, I don't have to keep working because I've already done the hard things first. I live by the motto that anything's possible, and that I believe in myself. Just like my husband always convinced me that he believed in me, and now I know that those words are true and that I can believe in me."

As for what the next chapter looks like, the businesswoman says she'll "have to wait and see."

"I'm constantly thinking about what I'm going to do next and I'm thinking five to ten years ahead. I don't think about things a year in advance anymore. I think we have to be even further ahead. I think the sky is just the view. I think there is no limit to what will happen. I think I'm capable and able to do whatever I want to do. I'm exploring all types of new things I can do, and I'm really excited about the future," she shares, adding that she thinks her husband would be "incredibly proud" of her book.

"I think in many ways; he's already read it. I think he helped me write it. I think he'd be so thrilled that I did it. I think he'd be moved. I think he'd be moved to know that JR was always the guy who really loved to know if he impacted your life. I think he would really be happy to know that his favorite person was greatly impacted by him, that he changed my life. I got to thank him even after for all the incredible gifts that he gave me of lessons and love along the way on our journey. I think he'd be really proud," she concludes.

Scrambled or Sunny-Side Up? is available now.